Major Milestone

Eye tracking is one of many things they assess at the Brain Balance centers. I was quite surprised when we got the results of the eye tracking for both Dylan and Preston. Preston's eye tracking was practically non-existent and Dylan's eyes weren't much better. Even the results of the reading test where they track their eye movement while they read were much worse than I thought. Dylan is actually a really good reader so to see the computer results of the infrared scan of his eyes while reading was surprising. They didn't track from left to right and then down to the left. They kept backtracking a bit and then skipped back halfway before moving down a line and finally over to the left to start reading on the next line.

As part of the home exercises for Brain Balance, Dylan and Preston do eye exercises three times a day. Preston's eyes lose focus quickly and I have to remind him to track the item he is following quite often. Dylan can focus much better, but still loses his tracking here and there. The thing they both struggle with is alignment. Don't ask me all the specifics, but basically they need to be able to go cross-eyed and see double when tracking an item from far away in towards their nose. I was SHOCKED when I realized neither of my boys could cross their eyes. Like at all.  I thought everyone could do that. It was so weird especially watching Dylan try and having neither eye move much at all. I tried it on Marissa (my 4 year old) and she can do it perfectly. The other strange thing is that Dylan was convinced he was tracking it well. He did not believe me when I told him he wasn't following the pencil.  We have worked on it three times a day, six days a week since August 25 (our official start date). A few weeks into the program, Dylan's right eye (the one that corresponds to his left brain - his stronger hemisphere) started tracking the item better during alignment. Then 2-3 weeks ago, I actually let Dylan cover his right eye and just track with his left eye so he could try to feel what it should be doing. He could track it when the right eye was covered. So once in awhile before we started, we warmed up with just his left eye tracking. After that his left eye started moving a little bit during alignment. It wasn't tracking it correctly, but it was moving. And sometimes the eyes were working together, although they were bouncing from side to side and up and down trying to follow the pencil.  

This morning my husband was working on morning exercises with the boys and yelled out, "You did it right! Hey Hon, Dylan just did the eye exercises!" I thought it was awesome, but probably a one-time thing showing his eyes were getting stronger and he was making some progress. He did it again and sure enough, Dylan followed. I had to go see for myself! Even with me standing there as a bit of a distraction, he could track the item (the piece of chalk Marcos was holding). Let's just say, there was much jumping around and tears of joy this morning. And Dylan (who often complains about Brain Balance and the diet, screen time restrictions, and home exercises) told me he was glad he was doing Brain Balance and could tell it was helping him. I kept worrying that he wouldn't be able to cross his eyes again, but both this afternoon and this evening, he crossed his eyes during exercises. I'm sure there is always a chance he could regress while another part of his brain is developing (we've witnessed that before) but I'm confident this is for real and was a MAJOR MILESTONE for Dylan today. Yay!

 I managed to get a couple pictures of his eyes. I sure wish I had video of them before so you could really SEE the difference. It's a HUGE transformation in ability! At first his eyes barely moved. A few weeks later, one eye tracked correctly but the other held still. A couple weeks later, they both started moving but they were ALL OVER THE PLACE (seriously picture the little ball in a pin ball machine bouncing here, there and everywhere with no rhyme or reason). And finally crossing both eyes and tracking the item from start to finish.  I'm not sure I can even attempt to convey the emotion we felt. Overjoyed! Ecstatic! Grateful! Overwhelmed!  It's absolutely AMAZING!!

When Bad Is Good

In "Reconnected Kids" by Dr. Robert Melillo, there is a chapter titled "When Bad Is Good (And Vice Versa).  It basically talks about how every stage of brain development has negatives and positives and when a child seems like an angel all the time it's not necessarily a good thing (That was totally the case for us with Preston.  He was such an easy baby!  And then we realized it's because his brain wasn't developing the way it should have).  On the flip side, when children are behaving badly or regress in certain areas, it can be a result of a growth spurt in brain development. (I'm totally paraphrasing so don't quote me on anything I say.  Read the book for more details, but read "Disconnected Kids" first.)  At the Brain Balance clinic, they warn you that when your child goes through the program, their brains will be going through missed steps along the way, starting at age 0.  So my 10 year old might actually behave like a 2 year old for a little bit while the weaker side of his brain develops.

I already knew this to some degree because of the other therapies we have done with Preston.  In our experience, regression ALWAYS preceded major leaps in brain development (ones we could actually see and discuss), but it's good to remind myself of this, especially in the thick of things.  Let's just say, if bad is good, then my boys are definitely on the right track.  The past few days have been CRAZY HARD!!  We have had meltdowns and frustration since we started the program, but this is a new level of hard.  Both my boys have right brain deficiencies, although Preston also has a left brain deficiency (Overall he's delayed.  Dr. Melillo calls this particular situation the Peter Pan Syndrome in his book "Reconnected Kids").  The personality and challenges of my boys are night and day so their bad days don't have much in common other than the fact that they make me crazy.  ;)  They both are experiencing major emotional meltdowns.  Here's a glimpse of how that looks in each of them.

Preston gets whiney and negative.  He gets lazy with home exercises, chores, or schoolwork.  He complains and drags his feet on everything!  That tends to be a struggle for him in general, but with the program, it's just magnified many many times.  Preston is also SUPER LOVING so when he is feeling loving towards me (or his baby brother) he is often too loving and expressive.  He can't stop himself.  He has to come hug me right then and there.  Or he HAS to kiss the baby before he can do anything else.  It's darling and a quality that truly endears him to me, but is distracting and can get annoying when I'm trying to get him to focus or when the baby is trying to sleep or is already really fussy.  Another behavior we have seen is copying.  He copies everything Dylan (or anyone) says, just because he thinks it's funny.  Now...this one is less annoying to me than to his brother, but it's still worth mentioning as far as negative behaviors go.  I have to say this one makes me smile sometimes.  Seeing him tease or talk back (not to me but when he does it with Dylan) actually helps me to see progress.  Boys are such silly creatures...I have learned this the past 15 years or so, being blessed with three of my own (and a big one I married).  But the quick, witty, teasing, "I'm not going to take it and let you win or be bullied by you" attitude is really good for me to see from him, even though it means my boys are fighting CONSTANTLY!

Dylan is more aggressive and explosive than Preston so that has become EVEN BIGGER for him!  That is not an easy behavior to deal with, especially in a 10 year old boy.  But we're trying to be patient.  He snaps and is angry about something he has to do or can't do, etc.  When I asked him to move down on the bench in church on Sunday, he wouldn't budge.  When I went to lift him a bit to encourage him to slide down so I could sit with the baby on the end, he threw himself on the floor in a big heap.  And when I took him by the arm to the hall to talk about his behavior, he was sure to add in a voice much louder than a whisper, "Let go of me!  You can't touch me!  I'm not going with you!  You can't make me!!"  Definitely gives anyone in the near vicinity plenty of material lest they want to judge my excellent parenting skills.  Hopefully most people understand, but it's still definitely on the embarrassing side, even for someone as open and honest as me.  I'm trying not to worry about what anyone else thinks though, but that is easier said than done.  Dylan is very emotional and hard on himself.  Again, in general that is something he struggles with, but right now it's just bigger.  His frustration yesterday that he couldn't do a back flip like his friend became a major issue.  It upset him so much that he came inside and sulked instead of playing in the backyard with friends.  He just couldn't cope emotionally.  He was pretty much depressed about his entire life and expressed that in every way imaginable.  SUPER HARD!!  Hard to deal with and hard to watch him struggle so much.

So what does it all mean?  No we're not ready to throw in the towel.  We trust the process and felt VERY strongly about the need to complete this program with our boys.  But that does not make it EASY!!  The financial commitment, time commitment (home exercises and driving to brain balance sessions), the nutritional commitment and extra effort that requires (AND DISHES...holy moly I'm doing dishes ALL the time now).  Adding behavior problems in children who are regressing while their brains work on catching up on missed developmental stages increases the burden.  But is it worth it?  I'm convinced it is.  Stay tuned, folks!

Tender Mercies

I was talking to a friend yesterday about our need to find a bread recipe we liked because we can't afford $6 a loaf for bread.  Guess what.  Today she called to say she was at a little bakery close to our house and they carry gluten free, dairy free, soy free, nut free bread.  It's normally $5 a loaf (a dollar cheaper than in the store) but they were marked down to $2.99 a loaf because the "sale by" date is 9/25.  She brought me a loaf of white and 7 grain bread to try.  My kids tried a sandwich and were THRILLED to have bread again.  They tried it plain and were just as excited!  They LOVED it!!  So I marched myself and my van full of children down to the bakery and bought 40 loaves....almost two whole shelves of my upright freezer.  I would have bought what they had left, but I didn't think I would have room in my freezer with the meat and veggies I already have in there.  If the kids have sandwiches 3-4 days a week and maybe a day of toast or french toast or whatever here and there, this bread should last me 15-20 weeks.  Yay!!  That's assuming my husband and I don't eat a lot of it, which I don't think we will.  The hubby can have the real stuff when he's working and away from the kids so I doubt he'll be tempted by this bread.  And I'm fine with leftovers or salads for lunch.

God is good!  He is fully aware of our needs and desires, even when they seem trivial.  Today my tender mercy from the Lord was a friend with keen eyes and a desire to help and a bakery sale that made bread a reality for my family for the next little while.

Update: Three Weeks of Brain Balance

Positive Changes

• The most recent change came during church yesterday.  Preston was asked to give a prayer in front of a big group of children.  In general, even talking in front of people makes him nervous.  He has a very unique voice he uses when he is nervous or anxious.  He either talks in a deeper kind of quiet voice or mumbles with his teeth shut so you can't really hear what he's saying.  He even does this at home when he's saying a prayer.  He just feels shy or nervous in certain circumstances and then the awkwardness emerges.  Today my husband texted me to tell me about Preston's incredible prayer (I was home with a baby who had thrown up all over me at church.  Yeah...good times right there!) Apparently Preston spoke in a CLEAR voice and used his own words, not repetitive phrases he often relies on when he's nervous.  He asked that everyone would be reverent, obedient, and would listen to their teachers.  I know this may not seem like much, but it is HUGE for this little man.  
• As part of the exercises the boys do three times a day, they perform push-ups and sit-ups.  Dylan was able to do quite a few push-ups so we are working on perfecting his form rather than increasing the number of push-ups he can do.  Preston, however, could not do any.  I tried teaching him on his knees and that didn't work so we went to the wall for wall push-ups.  Even with that modification, he complained and didn't perform them well.  We finally decided to do a modified knee push-up where he was more in crawling position during his push-ups.  He was still getting more than I felt he was on the wall.  A week ago today something clicked and he WANTED to do push-ups on his toes.  His form was awkward, but he was determined.  He did two or three push-ups moving about an inch up and down, but he was on his toes.  A week later (yesterday) he is now doing 5-6 push-ups on his toes and is able to go about halfway down each time.  It's incredible how quickly it went from not even being able to do wall push-ups to doing several decent push-ups in a row.  He's got a long way to go to perfect his form and add a few more, but he's well on his way.  
• The other main change we have noticed so far (that happened practically from the beginning) was how his expressive language has increased.  He was already doing okay in this area as he has made lots of progress with this the past several years.  But this is a NOTICEABLE change.  He is using big words, very grown-up phrases, and wants to talk non-stop.  His brain is AWAKE!  We are thrilled!  It is so fun listening to him and knowing what is in that incredible brain of his.  He tells me the details of what he did in school, what happened on the playground, or in his Brain Balance session.  There is a store at Brain Balance. The kids earn brain bucks for different things, and can save up to buy items from the store.  The other day when we were driving to his session he said, "Mom, when we get there, I think I want to tell them that I would be interested in minion stuff that I can buy at the store."  I'm not sure he's EVER used the phrase "I would be interested in..."  It was AWESOME and I couldn't help but smile and even chuckle a bit to myself.  
• Dylan's running speed h][p[p[:p[and his confidence in running and soccer has increased dramatically.  He's always enjoyed sports, but if he's not the best at something, he tends to shy away from it.  I guess that's a curse of being good right away at so many things.  But he is willing to work hard and seeing the fruits of his labor.  He scored a goal in soccer last week.  And he had an assist in another goal this week.  That isn't completely unusual, but he was just as happy with the assist or even playing sweeper as he was scoring a goal.  That need to be the one to score or being upset if he doesn't was not there the same way it usually is.  This is going to take time, but we can see an improvement.  
• Also, he has been better able to stop himself from getting upset when we remind him to do chores or homework before he can go outside or have another privilege.  Again, it's a work in progress, but there is a noticeable difference many times in his stopping himself from getting upset or snapping when something happens.  
• Forming a routine to make all the changes flow is proving EXTREMELY helpful.  Knowing they get screen time on Friday unless they lose it, is helpful.  Knowing when we do exercises, what we eat, etc. helps.  It just gets to be the way we live.  But those changes were very difficult the first couple of weeks, especially the diet.  

Negative Changes

• During a program that changes so much, and in particular changes the brain, some dips in behavior are to be expected.  We went into this already knowing that, but it's worth mentioning that in addition to positives, we are definitely experiencing the negatives.  Our boys are very different so it tends to look different for each of them.  For Preston, he has been whiney, complained and dragged his feet on many of his responsibilities.  For Dylan, he tends to get upset and try to say something to get under our skin.  The other day when I told Dylan no to something he wanted to do, his response was, "You're so mean! No wonder you don't have any friends."  He was clearly looking for a reaction from me.  I'll be honest, it's all I can do NOT to react to these behaviors some of the time.  This program is going to prove to be a huge growing experience for me as a parent as well.  Calm, patient, consistent, but firm.  Smile to myself and know that "this too shall pass."  
• Preston's negatives are sometimes quite amusing to me.  He isn't an angry person by nature so when he is mad and tries to show you he's angry, it often makes me smile.  He really wanted macaroni and cheese on week 2 and I didn't have the replacement stuff to allow him to eat this favorite meal of his.  I told him we couldn't have it for lunch, but I would try to get some or make a recipe so we could have it another time.  I told him the kind he wanted has gluten in it and we can't have gluten.  He looked at me and said, "No it doesn't have gluten in it!  Gluten isn't even a real word!  You just made that up!"  

A Letter To Our Village

Today is the end of week three of the Brain Balance program.  It's hard!  It's time-consuming!  We're super busy! I knew this going into it and knew we would need to get as many people on board as possible.  For those who may embark on a similar journey at some point, I thought I would share a letter we sent to our friends and family.  It has been a huge blessing to have those around us know what we are doing as a family.  The love and support we have received is incredible!  I highly recommend enlisting the help of those around you so you are not alone on this journey.  Here's the letter we sent to our friends and family.

Hello friends and family-

I apologize for the mass email, but it’s the easiest way to inform you of some big changes in our family.

Preston will be participating in a very intense therapy program called Brain Balance the next six months.  We are very excited, but nervous about this big undertaking. It is a major commitment, but we feel strongly that it is the best thing to help him continue to progress developmentally. It includes home exercises three times a day and therapy in the South Jordan clinic three times a week.  Dylan will be joining him for the at-home portion of the therapy so both boys will actually be participating in the program. 

It also requires some pretty drastic lifestyle changes.  For the foreseeable future, OUR WHOLE FAMILY will be eating a diet that is GLUTEN-FREE, DAIRY-FREE (CASEIN-FREE), SOY-FREE AND PEANUT-FREE.  We want to make sure everyone who may interact with our children knows about this change in our diet because I’m guessing the kids will be less than excited to turn down treats they come across in different settings.  If you know in advance of an activity that may include any of our children, please let me know.  I am happy to provide food and/or snacks for my kids so they do not feel excluded.  I suppose having us around is now similar to attending the zoo.  Here is our official sign:

PLEASE DON’T FEED THE MONKEYS (aka: our children)! 

Our children also have VERY limited screen-time.  If my kids participate well in the program, do schoolwork and chores all week, they will get to have either 30 minutes of computer/video games or one movie (up to an hour and a half) per week.  That’s it!  They love playing and I’m sure will still welcome playtime with friends, but any time spent with friends will have to be completely screen-free.  I will be monitoring their earned screen-time at my home on Friday evenings and we will probably invite friends to join us on occasion for that. 

I know this is a total pain for everyone involved.  It requires a lot of effort!  We’re secretly terrified of such drastic changes. ;)  But we’re 100% committed!  Raising a child takes a village.  We’re asking for the help of our village to make this program as successful as possible. Let me know if you have any questions.  And thanks for being part of our village.  We're incredibly blessed!

Love,

Maria and Marcos

No Gluten, Dairy, Soy Or Peanuts!!...So What CAN You Eat?

I know, right?  That is exactly what we thought when we learned about the dietary changes we would be making.  We fully expected them to require us to eat a gluten free diet during the Brain Balance program, but we didn't realize it would require us to also eat a dairy free, soy free and peanut free diet.

At first, that was very overwhelming.  It still is to some degree.  It's easy to start thinking about all the foods you CAN'T have.  But once I wrapped my mind around it and officially committed to eat this way, I started thinking of what we CAN eat.  For now that's helping.

Here are basic things we can eat: 
Meat
Beans
Lentils
Fruit
Vegetables
Raw nuts (not peanuts)
Substitute milks (almond, rice, coconut milk, etc)
Rice
Quinoa
Starchy vegetables (potatoes)

So what does this mean.  For now (2 1/2 weeks into the program) I'm keeping it simple.  As I find things we can eat that we like, I will add them to the list so it's easier to shop and keep the things we need stocked.  Here's what our diet looks like.

Breakfast

• Eggs (my kids LOVE eggs, they're a good source of protein, and they're affordable.  We have plain eggs, omelets, and once in awhile have bacon or sausage with our eggs.  But mainly we just have eggs).
• Fruit
• Rice Chex (or another gluten free cereal) with Almond Milk
• Oatmeal

Lunch

Lunch is the most difficult for me to deal with because I used to do sandwiches, chicken nuggets, or something noodle-ish.  So I'm looking for good solutions.  

• Leftovers (whenever possible I serve leftovers from dinner the previous night)
• Lunch meat
• Fruit 
• Apples and bananas I usually serve with almond butter or sun butter to give them a bit more protein
• Veggies 
• Baby carrots and snap peas are favorites around here
• Sometimes I serve them with homemade hummus
• I even found a dairy free homemade ranch dip which is fun once in awhile
• Chips (there are some chips that they can have.  I check labels to be sure, but there are quite a few products now that are just potatoes, olive oil and salt)  My favorite are sweet potato chips.  Delicious!  That's more of a treat, but something they can technically eat.  
• Homemade chicken nuggets (with gluten free bread crumbs)
• Sandwiches with gluten free dairy free bread (yes there are options, but I only have so many hours in the day so making bread and homemade chicken nuggets only happens once in awhile.  I put my time into dinner so we can have a nice meal as a family and try to have the other other meals and snacks be fairly quick to prepare.  I just saw this recipe and wanted to link to it.  I'm still in search of a great bread loaf recipe, but this might be the answer for lunch sandwiches once in awhile.  Sandwich Rolls

Snacks

• Fruit
• Fresh
• Fruit leather (100% fruit) - I make this when we have access to lots of fruit and the kids love it for a treat
• Applesauce squeeze packets (I found a box at Sam's Club that makes them less than $.50 a packet instead of over a dollar each if you buy them individually at the store)
• Raisins
• Craisins
• Dried fruit (but check labels if you're buying it.  Many of them are not just dried fruit, but have added stuff, including soybean oil, which we can't have)
• Veggies
• Baby Carrots
• Snap Peas
• Celery with almond butter or sun butter (and raisins if they want - "ants on a log")
• 100% fruit juice
• Sweet Potato Chips
• Olive Oil Potato Chips
• Tortilla chips with guacamole (this is a new favorite at our house.  They kids LOVE guacamole).  

Dinner

In general, dinner is not too difficult for me to figure out.  I am trying to keep the grocery budget manageable though and form some new fun traditions for the kids so here is what I have come up with so far.

• We do a day or two of just meat, rice/potatoes, and vegetables.  Usually one fish day and one chicken day, but it could be any kind of meat really.  The kids LOVE grilling so while the weather is decent, we're trying to grill meat when we can.  
• I rediscovered a love of tacos with my kids.  I knew they liked them, but now that we aren't having a lot of their other "favorites" my kids are becoming HUGE fans of tacos.  So I'm going to do a taco night once a week.  There are so many recipes and ways to change it up (ground beef, chicken, pulled pork, etc) so it won't look the same every week, but this is what we decided to do.  And right after I decided that was a good idea, a stroke of genius hit me.  My kids LOVE "The Lego Movie!"  LOVE IT!!!  So we're going to have "Taco Tuesday" like on The Lego Movie.  It makes it more fun for the kids and starts a little family dinner tradition.  
• I'm going to do soup once a week as well.  There are tons of budget friendly recipes that fall into our dietary requirements.  And I happen to LOVE soup!  It doesn't really matter what night we do it, but for now, I'm planning on soup on Thursday since Thursday we have quite a bit of running around and I can get something going in the crockpot and it will be ready for us when we get home that night.  Also, Thursday is the unofficial soup day in Sweden.  They call it "split pea and pancake" day.  There's a whole history on it, but it started because of fasting on Friday so they would have a hearty meal on Thursday to prepare their bodies for that.  And since on my side our family heritage includes a lot of grandparents from Sweden, I thought that would be a fun way to start a meaningful tradition that opens up discussions of family history.  
• Rice and beans will be one of our nights as well.  It will sometimes have meat, sometimes be quinoa instead of rice, etc. but we'll have a rice and beans night once a week as well.  
• Friday used to be pizza and movie night at our house.  We're still having the movie part and if they keep their screen time hours (they don't lose them during the week) that is when they get their movie for the week.  We also have fewer commitments on Friday so Friday will be a day to try some new recipes I find online (whether it's gluten free dairy free crepes for breakfast or vegan macaroni and cheese for dinner).  

Snapshot Of Today

I thought I would write a few things down about where Preston is today so that we can better track it as we go.  We have detailed test results from Brain Balance, but as far as day-to-day reality of his abilities, it's nice to remember exactly where you were when you started something.

PRESTON

• Focus is still one of our biggest issues.  His abilities are coming along, but everything takes him FOREVER.  He can empty the dishwasher, but it takes many reminders and lots of encouragement to get there.  
• He also struggles to focus doing homework, reading, and even in conversations if they aren't something he's specifically interested in discussing.  
• Fine motor skills are a HUGE struggle for him.  He can do most buttons and snaps, but they take him quite awhile to get.  He doesn't do zippers very well.  And although he now dresses himself, his underwear, pants, socks, etc. will often be twisted or put on wrong.  Fine motor skills are to blame, as well as the fact that he is under sensitized so he just doesn't feel that they are all bunched up and twisted.  
• He doesn't tie shoes yet and even doing up shoes with velcro is difficult.  He just slips them on and calls it good most of the time.  
• Holding a pencil correctly is still tricky and a constant battle.  Handwriting is HARD for him! He prefers to hold the pencil with all four fingers rather than with the index finger, middle finger and thumb. 
• He LOVES to color and draw, but his way.  Do not try to correct the way he holds a crayon, marker, or pencil!  
• He rides a bike well and is getting brave.  He tries to do tricks like his older brother.  He also has a very good aim with a ball.  But he really struggles with team sports.  It's too much for his brain to process.  He was in soccer, but we decided to wait for team sports.  He didn't want to play and although he has pretty decent skill with the ball, following the pace of the game and not getting distracted by the people screaming on the sideline is hard for him.  
• Academically he is quite far behind, despite our best efforts.  He has letter recognition and knows sounds, but he's still at the point of sounding out three letter words that follow basic phonics rules.  Part of that is ability and the other part I believe is lack of confidence.  But we are still waiting for the reading "breakthrough" to happen where it becomes less of a step by step process and more automatic. 
• He does know a handful of sight words.  Memorizing isn't too difficult for Preston as long as things are repeated enough to him.  Retention, however, seems to be a struggle with much of his learning.
• Preston's special ed teacher gave me a paper with a bunch of 1st grade words listed in four columns.  I'm supposed to have him read it every day, time it, and count the errors.  And then chart it so we can see his progress.  The goal is to be able to read the whole paper in under 3 1/2 minutes with fewer than 5 errors.  To give you an idea of where we're at, that paper of 1st grade words took us 26 minutes to read with 55 errors.  Reading is definitely an uphill battle.  I suspect he has dyslexia, which just adds to the difficulty in reading.
• As far as sensory processing goes, he has mixed sensory issues.  Some kids are sensory seeking, others are sensory avoiding, and then there are those who have mixed sensory issues.  Preston is the latter.  So he jumps a lot and has kind of those proprioceptive needs.  He also licks things and chews on his shirt.  Thankfully not people, but he will lick objects to try to get the sensory input he craves.  When he is "off" he will actually ask for a cold ice pack to lick, which will help to calm him.  
• Sensory avoiding.  We CANNOT do fireworks.  We've tried many things and this is just not something he can handle.  The big loud noise at an unexpected time causes him to panic.  We are a very patriotic family by nature so this has been a difficult one for us to come to terms with.  In general, we try to avoid fireworks shows and if we do watch them, we try to be near a home where he can be inside watching a movie.  It still makes him very anxious, but we can usually get through it that way.  This year, we attempted to watch fireworks at a public park.  My sister brought an iPad with a movie and Bosch headphones that block out background noise.  We put him on a lawn chair facing me and I applied pressure to his legs as well (deep pressure also helps calm him).  Even with all those factors, we were barely able to get through it.  His heart was racing and there was fear in his eyes every time he looked up at me.  So we have made progress for sure, but in general, this is not something we can do.  This was the first 4th of July in YEARS that we were able to be together as a family during a fireworks show.  It wasn't ideal, but we were grateful to have the memory of all being together to celebrate.  
• Preston also gets very nervous with motion and heights.  He doesn't seem to have a very good feel for his body in space, and because of that tends to overreact with things that shouldn't be too big of a deal.  We had never been able to go on a carousel with him until two  years ago, and then he would only sit on the stationary bench with an adult sitting next to him with their arm around him.  No up and down motion of the animals while the carousel was moving in a circle.  That was way too much for him!  Last year, just before my baby was born, we were at the county fair and he actually got on the carousel next to Dylan (his big brother) and rode a horse that went up and down.  I was shocked!  I cried and cried!  He asked me what was wrong.  He does not understand emotional tears.  But he still struggles with this type of motion.  He hasn't wanted to go on a ride again since then.  But today (September 2014) at the zoo, with much hesitation, he tried it again.  And he did it!  He got through the whole ride going up and down while the ride went in a circle.  He was nervous.  But he did it!  
• He wears a blanket over his head a lot when he is trying to regulate his sensory needs. And when he can't calm down, deep pressure really helps him. I often roll him in a blanket like a burrito and then squeeze around his body with my arms and legs to give him deep pressure. 

DYLAN

Dylan has fewer things that concern us, but I wanted to mention a couple of the behaviors we feel the Brain Balance program will help him to improve as well.  

Dylan is very loving, loyal, and a natural leader.  He has a heart of gold.  He is very bright and is able to understand things at a much deeper level than most kids (or even many adults).  He can connect the dots and analyze life situations well.  He learns easily and is talented in many areas.  

Our biggest concern with Dylan revolves around impulse control and emotional outbursts. Although his challenges are few and less extreme than those of Preston, we feel that this emotional immaturity often casts a negative shadow on an incredible child.  He can be fine one minute, and completely lose his cool the next.  His emotional outbursts are not what they once were when he was younger, but we still feel they are keeping him from reaching his true potential.  We also feel that they are not just a product of bad behavior, but are the result of a brain imbalance.  From what I can tell, I think his biggest struggles stem from his frontal lobe being weak and underdeveloped and that as this comes along, many of these things will fall away.  As far as Brain Balance is concerned, many of the struggles Dylan has are due to  an underdeveloped right brain, as well as retained infant reflexes, so we are trying to catch the right hemisphere up to the left hemisphere in hopes of correcting some of these problems.  

Preston's Story

It's helpful to have a little history on Preston in order to understand where we started, where he currently is in his progress, and where we're hoping to go in the future.

Preston was born 4 weeks early and was considered premature, despite his 7 lb 11 oz size.  The last trimester of my pregnancy with Preston was very stressful, both physically and emotionally.  When I was 36 weeks along, I caught a bad stomach bug and could not keep anything down (including sips of Sprite or water).  I ended up in labor due to severe dehydration and Preston made his arrival much earlier than expected.  He spent 5 days in the NICU for low glucose and jaundice and then we were able to take him home.  

He was born with a hemangioma on his nose (a birthmark that grows rapidly the first year) and because of the location of the hemangioma, we had to follow up with a pediatric ENT monthly for steroid injections to try to keep it from growing too quickly and making it difficult for him to breathe or severely disfiguring his face.  He also had to follow up with a urologist right after birth.  We saw many specialists the first year of his life, most of which were at Primary Children's Medical Center.

At age 2, Preston still had 0 words (we could think of 5 he had said once or twice, but basically he didn't speak).  We had him tested and qualified for early intervention.  He started speech therapy in a group setting called "Talk Time."  A few months later, he began speaking more and we no longer needed or qualified for talk time.  He knew words and his vocabulary was catching up, but his receptive speech was practically non-existent.  If you asked him a question, he could not understand what you were asking him.  He communicated more in words than sentences, but we were grateful for progress.  He also had no self help skills.  He struggled to feed himself, wasn't trying to dress himself or help with things like most toddlers, etc.  He also didn't know how to play.  Thankfully he had a big brother to follow around and imitate, but to come up with ideas on how to play on  his own, that just didn't happen.  As stressed out as I was wondering what was wrong with my child and what I could do about it, I felt so blessed to have him.  He was calm and loving and truly a delight.  Although unable to communicate well, he had a way of connecting with others emotionally that I have rarely seen in others.  

By age 3, we were back in early intervention (now through the school district instead of the health department) for more testing.  It was so frustrating.  They got out a test and he just sat there.  They could tell he wasn't as low functioning as his testing showed, but he could not take the test.  After six different tests, they found one he could do to get a better feel for his level.  Instead of asking him questions and asking him to identify something (for example one question was "Can you point to the picture where you watch cartoons?" and there were six pictures on the page and he needed to point to the TV.)  He just sat there looking at them.  It was painful to watch and wonder why he wasn't getting it.  What wasn't clicking with him?  But they found a test with just pictures and he could name several of them so they went off of the results for that test.  They could tell from that test that he knew plenty of words so they ended up telling me he didn't qualify for special ed preschool despite his obvious lack of self help skills and understanding with his receptive language.  

His progress was slow.  At age 4, he still couldn't dress himself, help brush his teeth or hair, do buttons, snaps or zippers, and was barely potty trained.  But he could ride a bike.  It was so strange the way his skills in some area were normal or even ahead and his skills in other areas (particularly fine motor skills and receptive speech) were so far behind.  After going to the doctor for his 4 year well check and realizing he couldn't do the balance test (we think he couldn't understand what the doctor was asking, not just that he struggled to balance), we were referred to an occupational therapist.  Thankfully they knew what they were doing.  He had testing with a speech therapist, occupational therapist and was referred to an audiologist at another location for further testing.  This was his third time testing in a sound booth with an audiologist, but he was finally able to perform the test enough for us to get a feel for what was really going on with him.  After all was said and done, he had a diagnosis of sensory processing disorder, auditory processing disorder and developmental delays.  His fine motor skills were a huge concern so we started occupational therapy.  As part of his therapy he had to work on getting dressed, brushing his teeth, and then could go to the gym to work on other "fun" stuff.  It was PAINFUL to watch!  It took him so long just to try to understand what she was asking him to do, let alone figure out how to physically do it.  When we got into the gym the first day after dressing and brushing teeth, the OT told him to go check out the ball pit.  It broke my heart (and the OT's) to watch him.  Where most kids are wild and running and jumping to try to regulate themselves and get the sensory input they craved, Preston didn't even know what to do.  My precious 4 year old boy had no clue what to do in a ball pit.  He just stood there looking at us.  That was the first time I realized that so much of what he was able to do came from imitating his big brother.  Not only did he have a hard time decoding speech (understanding what was being said) he also had a difficult time in the ideation stage of thought (coming up with his own ideas and breaking things down into steps based on seeing the big picture).

Preston's audiologist recommended a program called "The Listening Program."  It is classical music that changes volumes at different times in different ears (you wear headphones) to basically stimulate the brain.  This was the first therapy where we really noticed improvement in his development.  He was flipping through a library book one day during the 10 week program and began telling the story to me.  I started sobbing!  He was pretending to read.  He was telling a story.  He was connecting a book with words.  It was HUGE!

Because of his new diagnoses, I had him tested for special ed preschool again.  He qualified easily, but only after two days of testing (instead of just one like most kids have) and four different tests just to get an idea of his level. Oh how I HATE testing!!  

He continued with The Listening Program and special ed preschool while he was 4.  One of our neighbors (his church teacher) found out the progress he was making with The Listening Program and told us about a friend of hers who did something similar.  It was a program called Sensory Learning, which combines light, sound, and motion therapy.  We decided to put Preston (and our other son, Dylan) through Sensory Learning the following January (2012).  It was a month program with two half hour sessions per day, but you can often see changes in development up to a full year.  Sure enough, he did AMAZING!  His communication skills increased dramatically.  Not only could he understand and answer questions better, he was now ASKING questions.  Not just "Can I have some juice?" but things like "Why do mermaids open their eyes under water?" (It came from playing with all the girl cousins his age, but I was thrilled that he was connecting the dots and wondering about something).  The best way I can describe the program is that it increases the synapses in their brain.  He was making connections because the right and left hemispheres of his brain were communicating better.  There were more neural pathways than before.  It was HARD!  Every time he would have a major breakthrough in learning or development, his behavior would take a dip.  Like big special needs meltdown type of dips.  But those were short-lived and when we realized it was always followed by major growth, we were better able to handle the dips.  

He made such incredible progress that we ended up putting him through the program again the next year (December 2012) and a third time six months later (June 2013).  He has completed the Sensory Learning program (SenTec) three times and made leaps in his development each time.  

Although Preston had an IEP, we did not feel like our local elementary school was the right place for Preston to continue his education after preschool.  It just didn't feel right.  We homeschooled him for Kindergarten and 1st grade and he just started 2nd grade this year.  We had a bunch of testing done through the charter school we attend last spring and have a new IEP in place at the charter school.  He attends class with his special ed teacher four times a week for 30 minutes a day and then finishes his school day at home with me.  It's a lot of driving, but we felt this school and special ed team was the best place for him to receive the extra help he needs academically.  We never seem to do things the easy way! ;)  We try to do what feels right and follow the direction we feel the Lord wants us to take with our children.  Right now it's special ed classes through a charter school.  

After we had a diagnosis (or several) in place, I started reading every book I could find on brain development.  I've learned a lot!  A LOT!  One of the books I read was called "Disconnected Kids" and when I finished that, I ordered the follow-up book called "Reconnected Kids."  This was probably a year ago.  Maybe a year and a half.  At that time, I knew the Brain Balance program was something we would need to complete with Preston, but was not sure how or when we would be able to make that happen.  After several changes in our family (we were planning on a job change and move, but ended up staying in our current home) we decided it was time to look into the Brain Balance program.  I had both Dylan and Preston assessed at the center and after getting the results, we decided to have Dylan do the at-home program and Preston complete six months in the Brain Balance program.  You can read more about the program at brainbalanceutah.com  It's a HUGE commitment!  It requires us to follow a gluten free, dairy free, soy free, peanut free diet.  We do at-home exercises three times a day, take supplements, and Preston goes for one hour sessions three times a week in the South Jordan clinic, which including the commute translates to three hours out of my day three times a week.  It's intense, but it's what we feel is right at this time and will help him continue on his journey.  

I decided to start a blog so I could make note of things I learn, helpful tips for others who may be in the program, changes we notice in Preston, difficult moments, etc.  That is the purpose of this blog.  Because Dylan is doing the at-home program and our entire family has committed to the dietary changes, this will not only be about Preston, although I suspect the majority of the posts will revolve around him.  Thanks for joining us on our journey!

The Purpose Of This Blog

We have four children.  Preston is the 2nd.  He's 7 years old.  I get a lot of questions about Preston.  He is considered special needs and has had developmental delays pretty much since birth, but a lot of his challenges are not super obvious.  We have been blessed to find the right treatments at the right time to help Preston continue to grow and develop.  This blog is to give a bit of history on our amazing Preston and to track and update his current progress a little better than I have been able to do in the past.